The First Set-Back

Yesterday I was walking to my car, heading home from work, and I was dreaming about the day we receive our referral and the first picture of our little girl. Tears came to my eyes and I was so thankful to be beginning this journey and feeling like it really is going to happen.

Today I got an email from the woman who will hopefully be guiding us through the process. I was hoping it was her accepting our application, but it wasn't. She traveled to Uganda last month and was emailing to tell the families she's working with that something is going on in Uganda and they don't know the future of their program there. This is a big blow b/c we have been researching countries and programs for over a year. Each time we thought we had decided on a country, we would read something about changes in that country and how adoptions are being suspended by agencies b/c they are uncertain what those changes mean to the adoption process and whether or not adoptions from that country can be successful at this time. We've been so excited about Uganda. We felt like we found a good organization to guide us. We knew it was going to be a long long process, but we were excited to get going with it.

After a good little cry while driving down the road, I started thinking about things. God is in control here. We have two biological children and were working on a third when He put this on our hearts. I don't believe that God would change our path like that without a complete plan. We want more children and could have them the usual way, but we want to follow God's plan for growing our family. I'm disappointed that Uganda may be heading the same way the other countries have for us, but nothing is certain yet. God has a plan in Uganda and a plan in our family. We'll pray that the changes or decisions in Uganda are positive for the children there. If they cause delays in the adoptions from that country, we'll pray that they are temporary and adoptions will pick up again quickly. And we'll be praying that God tells us if we are supposed to continue with Uganda or change countries again. I can't imagine how people live without God. I'm so thankful to know that I'm not in control.

God is good, all the time! It's easy to say that now, but I pray I recognize that more and more when I'm not thinking life is good at the moment. He is in control, He is guiding my path, and He always has a plan for my life.

Thomas and Keller are so fun right now. The weather is getting warmer and we are spending more time in the backyard. Peter built a zipline from the kids' swingset (the Black Pearl) to the tree the hammock hangs from. They're so cute swinging across the yard. It's so nice when they're getting along and talk nicely to each other. Now I know how my mom felt when I overheard her talking to my 2nd grade teacher, tearfully asking if Brent and I would ever get along. I'm sure kids just go through phases where they are closer than others and get along better. But boy is it a beautiful sight to see them swinging side by side having a nice conversation.

This last week the boys haven't been getting in bed as early as usual b/c of the light outside and extended time outside playing. Instead of reading every night Thomas has started telling Keller stories from the top bunk. Keller asks to hear stories about his little sister. Thomas talks about Peter, Carly, Thomas and Keller wanting a baby sister. He says they went all the way to Africa (sometimes calling it Florida) and did a lot of stuff there and finally brought her home. She grew up to be a doctor and helped a lot of people. The next day she was a Zoologist. I ask Keller what he's going to teach his little sister and he says he's going to teach her to sword fight. They say she can be Elizabeth, since they are Jack Sparrow or Will Turner from Pirates of the Caribbean.

Unexpectedly, we are buying a house and closing April 26th. We were NOT looking for a house. We are comfortable where we are, and LOVE our backyard. But it's been in the back of our minds that we would someday need more room and especially another bedroom. My brother, Brent, is a realtor and showed me a house that I asked to see near my parents house back in February. After seeing that one, he told me about another one that is his favorite on the market and one owned by a family he knew well. He had been to that house many times for engagement parties and family get-togethers. I immediately loved it. It had 4 bedrooms on the main level, a good size basement, extra bathrooms, and a similar floorplan to what we have now. And, it had a pool! We never wanted a pool before, but somehow this house, backyard and pool just fit. I always thought of a two story home and the pool being far from the house where I couldn't see or hear the kids from the kitchen windows or get to them quickly. This pool is maybe 20 feet from the kitchen door. I called Peter and told him he had to come see the house on the way home from work, and I called the lender before Peter had seen it. Thankfully, Peter loved it too, maybe even more than I did.

Well, we've been working through all the paperwork, inspections, appraisals, loan stuff, and we're so excited to have this home of our own to raise our family and hopefully be in forever. And the main reason we love it is because we picture our growing family there. We picture our pasty white boys running around the house and swimming in that pool, but we also picture our little chocolate skinned daughter running along behind them. She is in every dream we have for this home. Her name is already on one of the bedrooms and I'm already thinking of how I'm going to paint it and I have pages of Pottery Barn Kids torn out with ideas for bedding, just like I did when I was pregnant with the boys.

We're making some changes in our lives right now in preparation for our growing family. I'm trying to work more hours and think about how I'm going to manage when we bring her home. We're moving so that our home will be ready for her and each of our children will have their own space and plenty of room to run and play. We're laying down roots in a school district so that after Thomas changes schools next year, we won't have to worry about switching again. We plan to be in this HOME for a long long time.

It's an exciting time in our lives right now. This age is so much fun b/c we're all growing our families and enjoying our little ones. We have our struggles, but we support each other and understand this phase in our lives. Unfortunately we don't personally know anyone who has recently adopted internationally, but hopefully that will change soon, as we begin our process. But none the less, it's exciting to watch families grow, even if our way is a little different from theirs.

We are blessed. And we feel extremely blessed that God has put us on this path.